Gia Raquel

While you hold my head in your lap

The ocean’s air floats through our skin

And as I kiss you,

Your neck tastes like salt

There is something within your arms I could just cry about

As if all this time I’ve grasped a mere stranger

God, when I look at him

I don’t recall who he is

Maybe that’s why he holds me so tight

He’s trying to fill the empty spaces he pretends doesn’t exist

I miss him

I miss you

I held onto your hands so hard in the car

I felt you leaving

You couldn’t force yourself to look back at my eyes

No matter how long I searched your face

Short words, misplaced, lost

Who am I to accuse

When I have yet to find my place beyond these worn streets

But you sat in the driver’s seat with such conviction

I was desperate to know what you perceived to be real

If we are all but mirages

Then who am I?

Am I to make you forget?

So maybe if you are no longer alone

You won’t feel lonely?

My love,

The emptiness,

All of this,

Is temporary

Let me pour myself through your ribcage

Let me drown you in a happy death

Read between my lips and understand that even my sanity is no guarantee

Think before you say you love me

Please

Because I cannot bear another’s regrets

Not again